Nigeria Loses Entire Under 17 Soccer Team After MRI Scans

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Scandal has once again shocked the world of soccer when Nigeria's under 17 team (players who are 17 years-old or younger) failed MRI scans that revealed they were much older than 17. All but two of the players were disqualified. The team won their fifth FIFA U17 World Cup last year. Nigeria has a history of cheating in U17 matches, using older players.

What most surprised me were the MRI scans! You can really (sort of) determine if a person is over 17 using an MRI scan? Next time a girl seems interested in me, but looks too young I'm demanding an MRI scan! Show me the MRI scan!